Should You Do a First Look? An Honest Take From a Wedding Photographer
One of the most common questions couples ask while planning their wedding timeline is whether or not they should do a first look. From a photographer’s perspective, this question comes up so often because it sits right at the intersection of emotion, logistics, and expectations. There isn’t a universal right answer, and despite what trends or social media might suggest, the decision should always center on how the couple wants to experience their day, not how it’s “supposed” to look.
A first look offers couples a quiet, intentional moment together before the ceremony, away from guests and distractions. It can be grounding in a way that’s hard to explain until you experience it. Many couples find that seeing each other privately allows them to release nerves, be fully present, and connect before the pace of the day picks up. From my side of the camera, these moments often feel especially honest and unguarded, because there’s no audience and no pressure to perform.
On the other hand, choosing not to do a first look can be just as meaningful. For some couples, the ceremony reveal holds deep emotional weight, and they’ve always imagined seeing each other for the first time as they walk down the aisle. The anticipation, the buildup, and the shared experience with loved ones can make that moment feel incredibly powerful. Wanting to honor tradition or personal vision is not a lesser choice; it’s simply a different one.
From a photography standpoint, I’ve seen beautiful, emotional reactions happen both ways. A first look doesn’t diminish the ceremony, and skipping one doesn’t guarantee a more emotional aisle moment. What truly shapes the day is the connection between the couple and how they choose to show up for one another. While first looks can help with timeline flow and create more breathing room, logistics should never outweigh how a moment feels to you.
Ultimately, the decision should come down to what will make your wedding day feel the most true to who you are as a couple. Whether you choose to share a private first look or wait until the ceremony, your experience matters more than any trend or expectation. As a photographer, my role is not to push you in either direction, but to support your choice and document the day in a way that reflects it honestly, just as it unfolds.